Why You Want To Listen to Women
Because March is Women’s National History Month, I want to take this opportunity to tease out just why I trust and cherish the instincts and the voices of women.
I recently invited people to honor women in 4 powerful ways:
pay more attention to women
honor a female elder
read a book written by a woman
and – of course – vote for a woman
To be honest, I have been conditioned to listening to women, (so maybe I’m slightly biased).
Growing up in a female-dominated family, with two formidable grandmothers, a heartbreakingly clever, beautiful mother, some wonderful aunts, a few cousins, and a pair of stalwart girlfriends.
My father, though physically in the picture was never there emotionally; I remember feeling sorry for him as he receded into the background and eventually out of my life.
Here are the 4 ways:
1. Pay More Attention To Women
Look around you and notice women whose paths you cross. Really notice them and have gratitude for their contributions to the world.
I’m thinking now of a lovely lady called Debra who cuts my hair with the greatest of precision, and with love, whose friendship I have cultivated over the years simply because she was a master at making my hair and appearance look great, and she had a curious mind and infectious laugh. She always made me feel better about myself… We shared stories of family, travel, and of course politics.
This woman is a healer, and a good friend. I invite anyone reading this to look around and take stock of the women you notice as you move through your days, women doing seemingly ordinary unglamorous jobs, and consider their character and strength.
2. Honor a Female Elder
My mother’s sister whom we called “Pucky” is the first elder I honored… whose real name was Ellen, was a true family “character” – a writer, a woman who loved words and used them to make you laugh, gnash your teeth, and appreciate her lively mind.
She had beautiful dark brown eyes, but thick calves and an awkward way of moving about, she was prickly and opinionated when young, and even more so when she got older.
She and my mother were quite a pair: Pucky was a reformed alcoholic who quit at 20, and my mother was a drunk who could never admit she had a problem, but forged ahead with her beauty and charm anyway, finally disappearing into a lonely, solitary old age.
These two women had loved one another for what they had in common, which was a sharp wit, a love of good books and theater; they were passionate about the importance of humor and they loved one another.
Aunt Pucky read my writing when I started to become serious, and told me I was really good; that meant a great deal to me, since my mother didn’t possess the courage to look at what I wrote. My aunt Pucky died about two weeks ago, and I think I will be missing her for quite a while, as contentious as she was. Her gift to me? She was a woman of substance who never gave up her dedication to living the life of a writer.
3. Read A Book Written By A Woman
I’ve been pouring through a rich and thoughtful book called These Truths by Jill Lepore, which is about the fragile experiment we call our American democracy.
She offers in these 600+ pages a vast and sensitive treatment of American history, with special attention to two particular wings of this history that were profoundly important: slavery, and the oppression of women. She shows how our idealistic system of government was severely challenged because of imperatives that both slavery and the subjugation of women presented.
It’s a great read, a slow read, because of the vast amount of detail (with wonderful illustrations), and I’m particularly grateful that she created this narrative during this dark time in our history filled with ugly racial discrimination and continuing disrespect to women. She shines a bright light on the story of our improbable and dazzling idea of a democracy, she stretches our thinking (she educates!), and her prose is more lyrical than most historians I’ve read. She’s a true teacher, a creative soul who has persevered.
An additional thought on the subject of women’s books: If you’re not up for Jill Lepore’s elegant tome, there’s always Bowing to Elephants, my significantly shorter 250 page memoir that recounts one woman’s journey from loneliness and obscurity to self-realization, through traveling, studying, cooking, music, and of course through spiritual practice. I am enormously proud of this book, with its beautiful soulful cover, its touching and intimate story told in lyrical prose, and the message it carries that we humans are all of the same family. I want the book’s message to spread far and wide and inspire all who pick it up… Find out more here: www.magdimond.com/bowing-to-elephants
4. Vote For A Woman
Though I didn’t love Hillary Clinton, my heart broke when she was defeated in 2016 because I knew that this country needed a female president. There were signs that it was the right time, with women’s causes crying out for attention, but sadly the public at large didn’t share the feeling.
I have been paying a lot of attention lately to the congested field of Democrats, and finally have seen a choice emerge in my heart/mind. Elizabeth Warren, while at times appearing to be a know-it-all, a person with a plan for everything, is a woman who possesses some pretty wonderful qualities: compassion, intelligence, honesty, a strong moral compass, and a commitment to fighting for what she believes.
I have come to feel affection for her perseverance (there’s that wonderful feminine quality again!). And I think she is worthy of our trust. We want that in our politicians – that understanding that we can rely on them and even see ourselves in them…
Some final thoughts: women cannot and will not succeed in our patriarchal world if they do NOT persevere and stay strong.
They must work harder and still maintain credibility. They must come across strong, but not too strong, or they’ll be called shrill and hysterical. They must have squeaky clean morals (as should everyone) and show leadership with an uncanny mix of smarts and heartfelt passion. They have to work really hard to get you to trust them…
I am glad I was born a woman.
I’m not against the male population, I know some very sweet, gentle, and smart men… But I’ve always felt happy that I was born into this body.
Why?
Because the challenges women face to realize themselves and come into power require serious courage and dedication…
Because a female often returns to the heart as the organ she can most often rely on…
Because she can look into the eyes of an African elephant and see her own hungering for the maternal…
And let’s not forget that she gets to wear exotic, sensuous clothes (as opposed to dark suits!) and paint her eyes turquoise blue … and lastly…
She is invited to trade some of her freedom for the chance to cradle a small child in her arms!